Wrong ATV at Desaru Fruit Farm

The description looked enticing enough: Join us at the Desaru Fruit Farm for some exhilarating ATV action. So Pangzi could look at boring fruit while I’d go for the finer things in life.

“Daddy, what’s ATV?” Pangzi asked.

“Adult… something something. You don’t have to know,” I said, “since it’s not for you.”

“I also want!” he insisted.

“Didn’t you read there’s an age limit?” I said dismissively.

The ATV was a pleasant surprise in the package. The last time I saw some of it was at a Taiwan hotel. It came on free after midnight.

On this trip to the forgotten beach destination neglected by the pandemic, the Desaru Fruit Farm was a mere bait so Pangzi would follow me here. I didn’t know it came with a special itinerary that included ATV until I read the fine print.

Perhaps that’s an add-on as a service to hook the adults, who would be discreetly shooed into a separate room? I couldn’t wait to find out.

The Desaru Fruit Farm tour started with a short lorry ride from the meeting place deeper into the farming area. There was a tour guide who was constantly explaining this fruit that fruit. Blah blah blah.

Pangzi took in everything attentively. I didn’t know he was into plants and all. In fact, he took up his place near the guide throughout and listened like a model student.

I stayed at the back of the group of course. It was so hot and the signs were so old and illegible that I couldn’t be bothered.

After listening to the commentary, Pangzi actually came back to me occasionally and repeated whatever he learnt from the guide. Blah blah blah.

The Desaru Fruit Farm was more than fruit. We came to what the sign said was a “petting zone”. Wait, has the ATV started?

It turned out to be a zone for an assortment of farm animals. Rabbits. Goats. Peacocks. Cockerels and hens. More goats. Plenty of goats.

The tour guide encouraged the kids to feed the animals. But the adults had to pay for the feed. Not inclusive. What a scam.

Then we took the lorry back to the meeting place where the ATV would commence. Finally.

“Remember to put on your protection,” the guide shouted in front of the kids. So blatant?

“Daddy, look – a buggy! I want, I want!”

“Yes, this is the All Terrain Vehicle,” the guide declared.

“Wait, there must be a mistake. ATV is this thing?” I asked. “Thought ATV only for adults?”

“That’s right, the kids can’t handle it,” the guide said. “But your son can, he’s tall enough. We’ll make an exception.”

So Pangzi got more than he bargained for. And I went back empty handed. Didn’t even buy any fruit.

We were here:

Desaru, Malaysia is now accessible from Singapore by ferry.